Cable Guy

Todays debacle of Oceanics cable service offering no service, is a quick reminder of how addicted we are to the internet.  


No Facebook in the morning is like having no pole for a stripper.  Bad analogy, I know, but Facebook is my coffee with my coffee in the morning.  And you know how it is, when a coffee person doesn't get their coffee in the morning.   I turn into a behind the scenes Martha Stewart.  The internet is my cigarette with my cigarette that I have with my coffee while drinking my coffee.  There should be a comma somewhere in that last sentence, but I

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Choice Choice

Amongst peaceful scenic views, there is disharmony in my ears.  And it's very loud.  I battle this sonic boom of  dramatic whining, with my imaginary mp3 player.  I fucking forgot to pack my Zune, so I have to pretend jam to Aerosmith with my pretend air guitar.  And with no earbuds to plug my human sonar, I am tossed in the mecca of dramaville, without a life vest.  Thank goodness for blogs.  


"Issues" are wherever you take them.  People that jump ship and ditch locations in hopes of a better situation, have yet to understand that.  But for some reason, Big Island inhabitants believe it's cooler if

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the times they are a changin'

A conversation with a friend, lead to tears of laughter.  I'll tell you why.  Facebook chat was on the fritz with this friends computer.  Or so I thought.  Through back on forth wall posts and comments, doing my best to help, it was discovered the culprit was not Facebook or the computer.  It was my computer illiterate female friend.  I added "female" in hopes of a more empathetic understating.  Bigotry is one of my little side talents.

In the midst of social media, where wall posts, IMs, Tweets, texts, sexts(when you're feeling naughty) and Words With Friends are the norm for communication, I decide to "call" her.  I know, weird.  Who

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What You Looking At

I hate making fun of people.  I really do.  This entry is NOT about harassing the less fortunate, but rather discussing the shrewd thoughts that go through my mind.  And I assume everyone else...


I met someone last week.  This picture is not of that person.  I pride myself in anonymity, on whom I share my stories about.  I'm just using this chicas mug as a point of reference.  Poor chica.  My newly added acquaintance shared the same eyeball sockets.  And here the story goes.

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Exuberance

Today...paying it forward.  I am passing along the art of longboarding.  You don't need certifications for this.  You don't need a licence.  You don't need to establish a fee.  The abundant smiles from rookie recipients, outweigh any monetary compensation.  Opportunities to prosper, come in the simplest of forms. A chuckle.  A cheer.  A hurray.  Captivating a soul, with one of Hawaii's oldest sport.  I prosper through others exuberance.  Today...I pay it forward.



On that note, I hope this person buys me lunch.  So my stomach can prosper.  Find out what beach on Foursquare.  I am the Mayor of my life.

The Jack of Ass

My ass has been super lazy recently.  That's what I get for buying a donkey.  *rimshot*.  Catching a cold last week, hasn't alleviated the lazy donkey either.  My production level has gone down from 'doing jack shit', to 'doing absolutely jack shit'.  Communicable bacteria and apathetic tendencies were the victor.  But that was the past.  I have updated my ass to the new iOS 4.0.  Now I can make folders.  And have my photo album tell me where I took specific pictures.  Hell to the yes.  Because sometimes I forget that I'm on OAHU taking mobile snapshots.  Thank you Steve Jobs.  You dick.


I have my Purel and my multitasking hat on.  See you guys later, I'm off to do jack shit.

The Fu in KippFu

With multiple meanings, the Fu is basically a parody off a parody.  For starters, "Fu", a snippet from the genius philosopher Confucius. Who emphasized on social relationships and morality.  e.g.  "Knowledge is recognizing what you know and what you don't"

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How To Order Edamame

bar setting;


party:       we'd like a round of vodka cran and some soybeans
waitress:  okay.  do you want garlic or just regular salt?
party:       yeah, you can put garlic salt.
waitress:   ....

The Peeves of the Fu

It really isn't a great idea to start the day, bitching and whining about irritants.  But like doing PC desktop housekeeping, stripping off old wax, or taking out the trash, it needs to be done.  Everyone has pet peeves.  These are some of mine...

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Holy Shit Shark

5:30pm. Courts, Ala Moana. A town break, known for its quick pitching face and high speed "rights". Another Honolulu afternoon begins its farewells. Sky, orange. The typical baby blue now shunned by the distant setting sun. The ocean, now a deep bluish-green. Tinted with mirrored images of orange clouds.

Last wave in. I'm pau...

Rewind. 2:30pm. Another gorgeous day in Hawaii. Time to catch the few remaining waves of the dying south swell. I take a quick spin through the park. Oogling over the bettys working on their tans. I parallel

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Virtually Addicted (posted April, 11 2010 via Facebook)

Have you every noticed how fast technology is advancing? It may be faster than Clark Kent trying to find the shitter. With the recent launch of Apples iPad, I felt compelled to spit out more comical bullshit through the topic of tech. 

During my final years of High School, we juveniles were strapped on digital devices. On top of that, the ones we had at the time were pieces of shit, compared to todays standards. If you remember paging 07734 or 23778008 and turning it upside down or lugging the ten pound green screen gameboy with the overheating battery pack attached to your hip, then you can relate. In the subject of music, we were on

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Food For Thought. E-coli Free. Part 1. (posted March, 16 2010 via Facebook)

Recently, my Facebook page has been acting weird, giving me a headache. Loading half-ass, stupid grey box doesn't go away after I poke someone, and trouble commenting on and publishing updates. Which may be a good thing. In my search through Google, tech forums, and countless blogs, I came across a few interesting articles. So interesting, they totally distracted me from seeking the answers I was looking for.

This quick Q&A interview with a Facebook Psychologist...who would of thought there was one...captured

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News Feed Drama is Old News (posted March 13, 2010 via Facebook)

DRAMA is like the skin of deep fried chicken. You know having too much of it is bad for you, but....it tastes so damn good. Thats why we love movies like The Shawshank Redemption or digest endless pages of the Twilight Saga. Stories that captures our imagination and allows us , for that brief moment, to live vicariously through it's characters. For most of us, it's simply entertainment. For others, an escape of their own personal affairs. But these are works of fiction created for consumer enjoyment.

As for me, I have a shitload of real life drama. So does everybody else. Let me re-write this. You have a shitload of

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2010 Hawaii Tsunami. Kipps Version.

February 27, 2010, Saturday morning 7:45 am. My cell phone is buzzing from a recent message. In white colored font with dark blue background, it reads...Kipp, tsunami warning. turn on the news.

It takes a while for both eyes to open in the a.m. One eye slowly opens and the other plays catch up for the next five minutes. This day was the complete opposite. Jolting out of bed, I quickly turned the tv on to unknowingly begin, the waste of a picture perfect day in Hawaii. In other words, I could have gone surfing.

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The Ever So Useful "Like" Button (posted February 08, 2010 via Facebook)

THIS note writing is very therapeutic. you should all try it sometime. especially the ones who really do need therapy. if you're not sure that you do, please read this...and then he said, "let there be status updates". the author is not responsible for dizziness, fatigue, ringing in ears, prolonged erection, cannibalism or douchebagacitus that may occur.

With all those updates, applications, mobile uploads, videos, links, who said what to who and who is now friends with me, i had throw in the word me. who really has the time to indulge into all of ones news feed?

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...and then he said, "Let there be status updates" (My first blog entry)

SO i decided to create a note for this because the discussion of the title above is limitless and will need more than 420 characters allowed in a status update. also, facebooks new "simple" layout will probably be more complicated for those who still drag their knuckles. if you decide to continue reading, know this. i will, to the best of my ability, keep things short, concise and avoid fucking offensive remarks. 

first, let me say my english and composition are horrible. my last English course consisted of Sports Illustrated as the text book. no kidding. hey, the reason i signed up for the class is because of the Swimsuit

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